When in doubt, look for the fear. When someone acts in a surprising way, we can begin to understand by wondering what they might be afraid of. ~Seth Godin
Years ago I entered a coffee shop expecting nothing more than to have an educational conversation with a colleague. Little did I know that the hands of fate had woven an unexpected surprise visitor that would forever alter the path of my unknown future.
As I entered the shop and rounded the corner I saw someone else accompanying my colleague. There was a man twenty years my senior sitting behind a laptop. Being honest, I was miffed at the idea of an additional unknown person at our table. Surprise mingled with curiosity within me, as I wondered what role he played in this impromptu meet up. In a short time I was able to qualify his kind demeanor. His humble stories mixed with scars to show brought the presence well lived wisdom,
As our conversation unraveled, I was drawn into his educational approach. He spoke in a way of thinking that was foreign to me, a philosophy that embraced selfless service to others. It was as if I had stumbled upon a treasure trove of perspectives, each gem of insight casting a new light on the landscape of my consciousness.
Near the end of our meeting, the wise man handed me a book, its pages were unknown territories waiting to be explored. The topic resonated with the core of my being. With each new chapter it was as if I was journeying through uncharted landscapes of thought, each following book cast a stepping stone toward a new horizon.
His suggestive words of encouragement were like seeds planted in fertile soil, germinating thoughts that were dormant within me. I was a sponge craving for water. He showed me what was possible. This ignited a spark within fueled by an idea that would set me upon an unexpected course of self-discovery.
The fire within was stoked, and over the course of these past years, it blazed into an inferno of enlightenment. The intensity has been hard to contain at times while weathering the storms of an evolving life. The road less traveled called to me. It was a path unmarked by convention, that only when I slowed down could I see it. It was a dance between the comfort of the familiar and the allure of the unexplored. Where I was headed with my GÜD life was not sustainable for my future.
The struggle was as fierce as an alcoholic at a party, doubts and fears swirling like whirlpools threatening to engulf me. The road where there is no path was a treacherous terrain of challenges and setbacks. Yet, with every trial, I developed resilient roots weathering the storms and growing in the face of self-inflicted adversity.
Through the practice of vulnerability it revealed the core of my authenticity; this is where I found my strength. As I stepped outside my comfort zone I leaned into the unknown, turning failures into stepping stones toward my purpose. In my vulnerability, I discovered courage, and in courage, I could see what was possible.
Over the years, the wise stranger became more than just a chance encounter. He became a mentor, a guide in the labyrinth of self-discovery. Though he lives a very successful life, he believes one's greatness lies not in individual achievements, but in the positive impact we leave on the lives of others. Our friendship has been built with thoughtful conversations, unique life experiences, all a contribution to the melody of growth.
Of all things that I have pursued in my life, this one has been the most challenging to carve out the time to make possible. I've found that as I clock more times around the sun I become further distracted by the details of execution. Maybe it's perfection that I seek or that my intentions are too calculated...
or maybe, it's simply fear.
Religiously, over the last seven years, I've published 316 blog posts every Friday. As I revisit the last eighteen months of my life, not one has orchestrated a buildup of tension like this:
The happening ~ March 25, 2022
I can. I will. I must. ~ April 23, 2022
Actions ~ May 15, 2022
I you had 47 days ~ June 10, 2022
Finding Jason Brady ~ June 18, 2022
Remember August ~ August 19, 2022
The world doesn't wait ~ September 16, 2022
Mindset ~ October 8, 2022
Potential ~ October 30, 2022
Mist of failure ~ December 9, 2022
Words from a Snowman ~ December 23, 2022
Waiting for Never ~ February 24, 2023
Time, Consistency and Transformation ~ March 17, 2023
Pivoting Forward ~ April 21, 2023
Is it, or.. ~ June 16, 2023
Cascades of Momentum ~ July 9, 2023
Gratitude vs Stress ~ August 6, 2023
Knowing what I know, rereading the titles tells me a story of riddled apprehension harbored by fear.
Fear of what I'm risking.
Fear of what I am letting go.
Fear in what my family, friends and customers may think.
Fear of failure.
Fear of success.
Fear of _________.
The mixture of Real Estate and my Handyman business is the equivalent of pairing pizza and beer. To the intensity of which I have created, the two could not be a better fit; on the surface... I have parlayed these talents consistently for the last four and a half years. Looking at the data, they can be categorized as a successful combination.
In spite of the qualified success, the consistent nature of the two has left me considerably hungover.
Over the last year I have found myself too hungover to address the bigger picture of the future. I love working with my hands, I love serving people with the gifts of creative mechanical creation and problem solving the universe has blessed me with. However, during this time I have leveraged this craving like an addiction to alcohol. It calms my nerves when I'm stressed and in doing so, the wins cause more stress afterwards as I cannot keep up with the demands.
*it was not intended to scale.
In my sober state now, as I reread the posts over the last few years it's obvious that the other side of me, Jason Brady, my alter ego, was trying to crawl his way back up over the mental stampede I was having with myself. This kind of lifestyle was not sustainable for the long term and he knew it. Reasoning with myself wasn't going to work either. Despite the collateral damage I was causing, the only thing Jason could do was hang on and ride out the bull inside until I succumbed to exhaustion; burnout.
If there were ever a compass that guided me towards my deepest levels of authenticity, it's been the discipline of showing up every week and sharing thoughts that are circling within my ADHD mind filtered through my heart. Although incredibly healthy for me, it has compounded the symptoms of extreme burnout.
I had exacerbated the latent self-induced stresses by not stepping beyond my fear. The battle between my personalities continued to be locked in a pressure cooker of paralytic action.
For the span of two years I toyed with the idea of what could be possible. Then a comet sent from the heavens above came down and set my soul on fire. It would take another eighteen months of deliberate action fraught with droves of uncertainty forging a level of resilience I had not experienced in my life before.
Recently in a moment of considerable vulnerability my wise mentor eloquently responded:
As you go through life there will always be things that cause fear.
It's not about what others think, it's about how many people you can help.
We see a very talented person in you who has the capacity to do amazing things.
His words delivered the spark to the fire I struggled to create. In the fog of apprehension my visibility was bleak. The fire provided light to the darkness which allowed me to see beyond my current state... I was more prepared than I knew. The flickering flames transcended warmth inside allowing my shivering nerves to calm down. Teeth chatter stopped, blood rerouted to the brain and the vapor of confusion disappeared like nighttime rain after a desert sunrise.
With this transformative clarity I looked back upon the last eighteen months worth of blog posts and I'm drawn to the emotions of those moments. The purposeful titles flood my senses, constructing a correspondence etched into my history, known solely to a future embodiment of who I am.
It's profound.
"The happening of inspiration ignited a fire within me. With the unwavering mantra 'I can. I will. I must.', I took deliberate actions, realizing that I had only myself to hold accountable. In the span of 47 days, I took a risk and transformed challenges into opportunities. On the journey of finding Jason Brady, I uncovered the power of persistence. Every August, I recall that the world doesn't wait – it's our stride that defines progress. A shift in mindset unleashed dormant potential and evaporated the mist of failure that once clouded my path. From the wisdom of unexpected sources, like the words from a Snowman, and my wise mentor, I cherish the art of learning. No more waiting for 'Never,' I embraced 'Now' as I navigated the currents of time, consistency, and transformation. Pivoting forward isn't a question of 'Is it, or..' but a declaration of courage. Each step I take generates cascades of momentum, propelling me toward success. In this journey, I discovered that gratitude conquers stress, for in embracing challenges, I have unearthed my true strength." After two years of consideration, followed by another eighteen months of applied action, I am beyond excited to share that I am an Account Executive and Educator with the Goall Agency. :)
If Real Estate and Handyman were like pizza and beer, Real Estate and Goall Agency are like chips and salsa. These two disciplines are extremely synergistic and are sustainable for the future- all with no hangover.
The Goall Agency allows me to help empower business owners to truly "love" on their employees! This enables them to attract top talent, and safeguard against life's uncertainties. I also have the ability to serve individuals and help ensure family security, cover retirement, health, injury risks... I also have the privilege to teach people how to become their own bank! Our program shields families from challenges like medical bills, home buying, education, retirement and so much more. The beauty of all of this is that the benefits stay through job changes and retirement! With the level of emotional fitness I have become conditioned for along with my uniquely diverse personalities, this kind of service to others speaks to me at the center of my being. Companion the many years of experience in successfully helping hundreds of people find a new place to call home through my real estate business...
Man?!?! :)
I'm Professional who gets to help build Legacies for a living! :)
Like a Painter working with a Poet, our combined work can evoke emotions and meanings that are more profound than their separate works.
Just as significant as naming my blog: GratefulMan.com
Naming my Goall Agency website has an equally meaningful message. Not only in what it means to me personally, but the significance of the intentionality individuals and business owners are providing for those they care for most: SelflessGoals.com
I am still working on some of the content about me specifically, however, the site is open for business. :)
When you have a moment, please jump on to the site and look around.
www.SelflessGoals.com If what I offer resonates with you or someone you know, please contact me as I would be grateful to help. In sharing my story, I wasn't just recounting my journey; I was extending a hand to others who might be standing at similar crossroads with their life. Having survived through what our family has faced over these recent years, my wise mentor's guidance, and the book, has been the catalyst for my transformation, awakening a dormant ember of purpose. Just as a lighthouse guides ships through stormy waters, my journey has guided me toward my true north, my purpose – a symphony of selflessness, courage, and the audacious pursuit of leaving a positive impact on the world around me. Thank you so much for your time in celebrating this long overdue announcement with me! A special thanks to my small family of wonderful agents at the Goall Agency along with our Coach ;) And lastly, an incredible thank you to my bride, Chas, for being exceptionally supportive of my journey. *From the day I wrote "the happening" to today occupies exactly seventeen months and twenty five days. Which rounds up to eighteen. If you count each highlighted post of the future message I wrote to myself, there are seventeen... add today's post of Beyond Fear makes for eighteen.
**As much as I was unsure about when to share this story, the message and the math tell me I was supposed to do this today. In the garden of humanity, the flowers of our individual efforts can bloom into a breathtaking tapestry of synergistic service. As we nurture one another with compassion and water the seeds of change with generosity, we cultivate a world where the fragrance of kindness perfumes the air and the vibrant colors of collaboration can paint the horizon of what's possible. Have a grateful weekend!
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